Yes, God winks.

Just got a good news, yday. I'm not giving all my hopes, but I'm praying for it to happen. 

Who never dreamed of marrying, "Nickolas Gene Carter"?

My childhood crush just got married!!!!

Me and my cuzzos Precious and Em-es making fool out of ourselves. Well, There is nothing new with that. This picture, however was taken on summer vacation 2001. We we're all giddy when Nick's showed up on the television screen during the "shape of my heart" music video on MTVasia, we literally rush in front of the screen and asked one of our cousins to take us a photo quickly while Nick is still singing. Still no iphone for taking a selfie, and digital camera is rare to find, we used the one with films.  

Oh, my childhood. It is composed of candies, stationaries, toys and boy bands. And, the use of internet is mainly for chatting on MIRC and searching pictures of the backstreet boys, Aaron carter, Britney spears, A*teens and many more. Very far from the generation of today, if I have to compare.

I originally like AJ Mclean and Nick's younger bro, Aaron Carter. But with the influence of my cousin, I get to get agaw with Nick as well. hehe. bata eh. I've grown up listening to their music. And, news about them goes with that. Learning Nick is about to get married just wowed me, but left a lil' sting in my heart. echos lang. haha

to Nick (close lang kami): wishing you a happy married life. no more, do I have to cry for you moments. I am a fan and you are a deserving star.

memory lane is the longest road

This hits home.


"Never Grow Up"

Your little hand's wrapped around my finger
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light
To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret
I'd give all I have, honey
If you could stay like that

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple
I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart
And no one will desert you
Just try to never grow up, never grow up

You're in the car on the way to the movies
And you're mortified your mom's dropping you off
At 14 there's just so much you can't do
And you can't wait to move out someday and call your own shots
But don't make her drop you off around the block
Remember that she's getting older too
And don't lose the way that you dance around in your pj's getting ready for school

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple
No one's ever burned you, nothing's ever left you scarred
And even though you want to, just try to never grow up

Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room
Memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home
Remember the footsteps, remember the words said
And all your little brother's favorite songs
I just realized everything I have is someday gonna be gone

So here I am in my new apartment
In a big city, they just dropped me off
It's so much colder that I thought it would be
So I tuck myself in and turn my night light on

Wish I'd never grown up
I wish I'd never grown up

Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up
I could still be little
Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up
It could still be simple
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple
Won't let nobody hurt you
Won't let no one break your heart
And even though you want to, please try to never grow up
Oh, don't you ever grow up
Oh, never grow up, just never grow up

Childhood, for the most of us, is one of the happiest moments in our lives. 

#feels

a lil' wreck inside.

and then she sighs...

Before I enter first year medical school for the second time, I keep asking God to make me feel about the way I feel when I reviewed for nursing board exam for the second time last 2010. -- You know, the feeling of wanting something very bad you just can't give up no matter how hard the process just to attained it?-- But all I get was doubts, lots of it. whether to continue medical school or just quit because that's more easy than the latter. Throughout the  school year, I was unconsciously searching, hoping for an inspiration to come -- the real ones, and no pretenses -- but as I lay my head on the pillow every night to sleep, I ended up with questions, " Is medical school really for me?", "should I keep on going?", "What if I fail again?". 

This school year was sure fun, -- outing with medfriends as if there is no school next thing in the morning, pigging- out to distressed ourselves, cutting classes if the professor were no fun -- but I was blinded by it. All play and no work. 

I relaxed. soo much, I admit. Nobody to blame but myself. I let the sugar-coated moments get through me. I should've controlled myself to indulge on things. but it happened. 

I failed once more, but this time it's only Biochem. -- the three subjects are for remedials, and I'm praying for it to passed. -- Imagined, if I pushed myself hard enough I should've enjoying the price right about now. But that's life, it will make you fall again and again, harder and harder until you learned the lesson. 

Second year, next year. I'm claiming it. It's hard to admit but, una-unahan nga lang yan, at the end of the day, we will all be Doctors. 

I missed this feeling, the feeling that really comes from the heart and not some pinilit lang to make you feel "ay, seryoso na ako". . I may not cry physically, but deep inside me I know I've woke up from a dream. I am ready to face reality, no matter how deep it'll bites.

God bless me thru my journey.

I'm looking forward on reading this blog in the near future with an MD on my name and a smile on my face.  

strawberryKrys